Freezer – Review

Freezer is yet another in an increasingly long line of low-budget gimmick thrillers centered around the idea that most of its runtime takes place in a single location. At the best of times, the end result might be something like Phone Booth or Buried, and at the other end of the spectrum, we have films like ATM, and this, the latest film from cinematographer-turned-director Mikael Salomon.

A detective named Robert (Dylan McDermott) wakes up in a freezer, on his birthday no less, with little understanding of how he arrived there. Some unsavoury Russians believe that he has stolen their money, and unless he reveals the location, they’re going to leave him to freeze to death, which shouldn’t take more than 3 or 4 hours.

The question that so often taxes films like this is – how do you make the film work if the protagonist is the only character in the scene? The undeniably lame answer here is to have Robert talk to himself to stave off “awkward” silences and let the audience know what he’s thinking, at least until the requisite Russian goons show up to knock him into shape.

Still, there are plenty of other issues to be concerned about here, least of all the total lack of technical precision in selling the audience this premise; Robert doesn’t even have visible breath inside the freezer, and for most of the runtime doesn’t seem all that alarmed given how close he is to death. In addition to this, there’s plenty of awful wisecracks (Robert refers to one of his beautiful Russian captors as “cupcake”), an almost complete lack of tension, and endlessly dull exposition regarding an impending twist which viewers will surely anticipate.

The only major compelling thread throughout is considering what Robert actually knows about his capture. It leads to some laughable twists and turns however, as well as a multitude of stupid decisions, and a hilariously nonsensical ending that completely defies the tone of the previous 80 minutes.

On the brief plus side, McDermott does his best in a slumming role, and easy-on-the-eyes up and comer Yuliya Snigir (best known to audiences from last year’s A Good Day to Die Hard) certainly distracts from the awfulness. Still, the 82 minute runtime even feels excessive in this effortlessly constructed sort-of thriller.

* 1/2

Freezer is in US cinemas on January 17th, and on VOD and DVD on January 21st.